Christmas toys and two year olds….xmas 2007

So Christmas with children is an ongoing learning adventure. I tried hard this year to pick presents that didn’t need batteries, allowed for quiet play and were age appropriate. Of course, none of these goals was met. Ian, aged two and a half received a T ball set. He promptly announced that the base of the set was a pirate sword and wacked his sister in the neck. Now that he’s discovered the soft bat, nothing will be intact within a week. He also received a toy tool chest. Man was he jazzed.

“Hammer!!! Hammer!!!! Hammer!!!!” he gushed. “I’m gonna Hammer!!!” To the average listener his use of the word Hammer brought to mind Thor the thunder good laying waste to a small village.

He has his own brand of logic. The other day he was busily carrying on a conversation with a pretend friend. He was holding a small pumpkin to his ear as if it was a phone.
“Who ya talking to?” I asked.
He looked annoyed.
“I’m taking to my girlfriend! Her name is 49!”

Now I know that he’s never seen Get Smart so I have to assume there a 48 broken hearts out there in pretend land. He is single handedly turning back woman’s lib a few centuries by simply numbering his suitors.

Ian also received that one present that makes Christmas fun. Santa gave him a motorized fully functioning John Deere bucket loader. It’s fast, faster then me. He has already proved that with practice it can be rolled over. It has also proved its worth as a toy crusher, rabbit terrorizor and furniture scratcher.

Wack a Mole seemed like a good idea. Killing pretend vermin to blow off steam. More thought would have led me to the conclusion that any game with FOUR hammers is a bad idea. While I scrabbled for 4 double AA batteries Ian joyfully smashed every Christmas tree ornament below the three foot level.

Well I gotta run. Ian is lining up the bucket loader for a high speed run down the twelve steps to the kitchen…………


~ by Brad Morrison on January 1, 2010.

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